MIKE BOY

NO CLUE

Film review by Fiore

OVERALL:

I’ve just finished watching MIKE BOY, and I’m having a difficult time finding something positive to say about this movie.  The script is ludicrous, the acting is terrible, the editing and camerawork are amateurish at best.

Initially, I thought the film had potential.  Placed in more adept hands, it could be something worth watching.  Then, the third act unfolded and any concepts of salvaging his debacle dissipated quicker than ice cream on a July afternoon in Phoenix.

PLOT:

Mike, played by Hugh Massey, is a waiter at a non-descript restaurant in a non-descript town.  He is monotone, both in his dialogue delivery and his facial expression.  An actor, with stage, or in this case, camera fright.  He has a girlfriend, Charlotte, who wants to be known as Lara, played by Emily Killian. She is not worth the grief she puts Mike through and acts like too many women who think they are special, but do not have the qualities to make them so.  While Lara acts very much like Mike’s girlfriend, she won’t let him admit she is, yet, she is quick to risk her life for a ridiculous quest.  A film will naturally suffer when the male and female leads can’t live up to their roles.  Just ask Luc Besson, with his recent VALERIAN debacle. 

MIKE BOY begins with an assassination of a mother and her infant child.  We never discover why they were killed.  The next scene introduces us to Mike, and without the aid of graphics, viewers must assume decades have passed and Mike is the infant child from the opening scene.  Mike is a wimp.  He is lorded over by everyone in his life; his co-workers, his boss, Lara, and her father.  There are flashbacks to an incident of bullying when he was young, but its context to the story is immaterial. 

One day, Mike is confronted by a one-eyed man who tells him all of life boils down to a battle between two opposing secret societies.  He charges Mike with completing several jobs to help ensure the safety of the free world, and for doing so, he will learn about his past.  Gerard Sanders plays the one-eyed man, Agent Chris.  He is as convincing in his role as a cereal box top.

Lara insists on partaking of this absurd task with Mike, and actually takes the lead on most of the jobs.  Inexplicably, the jobs take the duo to the same people they meet in their everyday living.  Not exactly the stuff world destroying decisions rest upon.  Along their path, they will encounter Ramzey, played by Peter D. Michael, who is the owner of the restaurant where Mike works; James, played by James Wellington, who is Lara’s father; Robert Sisko, who plays Ivan, a Russian drug lord; and Ron Gilbert, who plays a mysterious old man.  The only one in this group who brings credence to his role is Sisko.  The rest are all cardboard cutouts.

 

PARTICULARS:

Like most Indie films, MIKE BOY is shot in poor light.  Whether this is done due to having either no, or a poor lighting director is always suspect.  Cinematography Gonzalo Digneo is nondescript and editing by Slava Denisov is amateurish, with almost no concern for aesthetic quality. 

The true problem with MIKE BOY however is the script.  Hamzen Tarzan directed, wrote and even contributed to some camera work for the film.  While this is common in Indie films for the principal to perform multiple tasks, Tarzan needed more concentration on his script.  Even if he cleaned up the lame story, the dialogue is atrocious.  Stilted, uneven and forced, it sabotages any possible story salvation. Family videos have more emotional content than MIKE BOY.

 REPORT CARD:

ACTING = F

CINEMATOGRAPHY = D

SOUND/MUSIC = D

EDITING = F

LIGHTING = F

SCRIPT = F

SFX =  D

ACTION = D

SUMMARY:

I generally try to find something positive in a movie, or at least attempt to identify its target audience.  Mike is not a good protagonist.  The character is not liked in the movie, and certainly no one watching will find any redeeming or empathetic characteristics in his persona.  

There is a massive continuity break in the sequence with the yellow envelope that is never addressed, and the conclusion is so absurd it borders on the retarded.  I can’t find anything of value in MIKE BOY.  Feel free to comment below, and enlighten me, if you do.

REWATCHABLE INDEX: NONE